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There are reports that Hershel Walker, a staunch anti-abortion Republican and running for the Georgia Senate, has impregnated a woman. then paid for her abortion It dates back to 2009.
favorite Other staunchly anti-abortion Republicans, there is one thing to say about it. please do not worry.
Conservative radio host and former spokesperson for the National Rifle Association, Dana Roesch, said: Let’s make this week the best when she said: “I don’t care if Herschel Walker pays to abort a baby of an endangered eagle. I want to control the Senate.”
Abortion is unacceptable – except for this
Amen, sister. Stop those eagle babies! Like Loesch, I am a deep believer in the sacredness of life and am against all forms of abortion. Except for this, I accept this in order to prevent my party from losing control of the Senate.
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report Came from the Daily Beast, and all they had to back it up was a receipt from the abortion provider. A canceled check Walker sent the woman five days after the procedure. A sympathy card that Walker checks in. Walker denies everything and claims he doesn’t know the woman. As the Daily Beast reported on Wednesdaywho is also the mother of one of his children.
I want my party to be in power and I believe it is a sin to use the word “hypocrisy” so I have to side with Walker on this one.
The Senate rule is what matters here, and he was playing football!
As a matter of fact, I don’t think Loesch did enough to defend Walker at the virtual Eagle abortion clinic.
favorite Many Republicans rushed to stick with Walker In the wake of abortion news, we don’t care if the former soccer star is an ancient, transdimensional, shapeshifting entity of pure evil. A clown named Pennywise Terrorize a small town in Maine. I want to rule the Senate, but I’m sure Walker regrets his past desire to eat humans.
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Destroying a planet or two is fine if it leads to power
Heck, it doesn’t matter if Walker oversaw the construction moon-sized space station It blew up the 2 billion-people planet of Alderaan, then got into an argument with his son and cut off his right hand. not!
In 1219 Walker Free the Mongol Horde On the Persian Khorazmian empire after the Shah, Alla ad-din Muhammad II, broke the treaty. Controlling the Senate is just as important to our nation’s moral fabric.
Mordor’s rule isn’t bad when you think about it
It is possible that Walker is described in the Anglo-Saxon epic Beowulf as: Kaiju Grendel, “Cursed by God, Destroyer and Devourer of Mankind,” does not bother me if it leads to Republicans becoming Senate majority leaders. And the added allegation of slaughtering the inhabitants of Meadhall, Helot, built by King Wrothgar?
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No, there is a logic between the religious beliefs I firmly believe in and the lack of concern I would feel if I knew that Walker had remained an incorporeal evil for centuries. I see no political or moral contradictions. Before I rise again in the land of Mordor And not far from Mount Doom, he built the dark fortress Barad-dûr.If he gathers a large army of orcs and trolls You tricked the elf blacksmith Celebrimbor How to forge Rings of Power? Democratic Senator Raphael Warnock is a pastor and probably never paid to abort an endangered baby eagle.
Basically anything is fine as long as you win
Walker is actually dark lord voldemortwho must not be named, plans to rid the world of Muggles with the help of Death Eaters, but never to my endorsement of a candidate with qualifications, including being somewhat famous. It has no effect.
I want to rule the Senate. Selecting Herschel Walker is key to that end.And if that means it’s okay to find him once Snap your fingers while wearing the Infinity Gauntlet Instantly wiped out half of all life in the universe. I will not allow the morality I use to camouflage my greedy thirst for power to get in the way of my thirst for power.
Rex Huppke Humor and Satire:
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Follow USA TODAY columnist Rex Hapkey on Twitter. @RexHupke and Facebook: facebook.com/Rex Is A Jerk
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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY. Republicans Rally Around Herschel Walker Despite Talk of Abortion
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