Dear Abbey,
My father died five years ago at the age of 90. For the last 20 years of his life, my sister hated his second wife (who lost him) and therefore shunned him. She was kind to all of us. They refused to talk to him and announced that they would not attend his funeral when he was dying.
They couldn’t get here fast enough when the aunt informed them that Dad had more than a million dollars of cash left and was unwilling. They caused great pain to me by falsely accusing me of trying to steal from them. I have never taken anything from my sister. I made sure that the money was evenly distributed and then locked them out of my life.
For me, “family” is synonymous with loyalty, love and trust. Without it, we are just a relationship. I will never talk again. Am i wrong?
— Tired of Denver
You are not wrong. We would like to express our deepest sympathies for the loss of our father. If you have relatives like your sister, you don’t need an enemy. In such cases, it is common sense to protect yourself. Keeping your distance will achieve it well.
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Dear Abby, can you talk about the problem of adult bullying at work? Bullies are usually bosses and companions, avoiding harassment such as slander, ridicule, and gossip. This creates a very unpleasant work environment. This happens too often. — Be bullied once
Dear Bully: Sadly, you’re right. It happens too often. The first way to stop it is to tell the bully that you don’t like it. Then start documenting the incident, including the date, time, and what happened. Give that information to your boss or boss and ask them to stop. If that doesn’t work, submit your concerns to HR. If HR does not stop progress, submit the problem and evidence to EEOC. You have described a hostile work environment, which can be the basis for legal action.
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Dear Abbey, I recently hosted a bridal shower for my daughter’s upcoming sister-in-law. It was a wonderful event with good food and adorable decoration. Everyone enjoyed it. After that, my daughter made fun of me because she didn’t give me a gift. I was stunned, hurt, and a little angry. The cost of the shower, excluding my time and effort, far exceeded the cost I would have spent on a gift.
My daughter is now angry with me because I told her she was rude and ridiculous. Do I need to apologize and get an additional gift for the couple? I hosted a lot of such events and always thought the party was a gift. — Crazy for Albuquerque
Dear Annie: According to Jennifer Jenkins’ The Everything Wedding Shower Book, “It’s customary for a hostess to get a shower gift from the bride, like everyone else.” But I agree with Jennifer. I don’t know if. After spending time, effort and money on planning and running the shower, I don’t think I really needed an additional gift.
Dear Abbey, was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.Contact Dear Abbey www.DearAbby.com Or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA90069.
This article was originally published in The Providence Journal: Dear Abbey: The Sister’s Show of Greed is the Last Straw for the Brothers